Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Naked in target

Well not quite.

Paige and I had been to a doctor's appointment in a city close to our town about 30 minutes away.  Everything went well - everybody's healthy.  Perfect.  The only time Paige and I go to McDonald's is after the doctor or shots.  It is something we have done since she was a year old and will probably always do.  It was such an early appointment we even made it for breakfast.  I had a list of to-do's that Friday because it was the day that Paige was going away over night (TWO nights) with her grandparents at their lake place in Ontario.  I knew Paige needed a new spring jacket, a new bathing suit and some sandals - seeing as her pink croc look-a-likes didn't come home from daycare and haven't turned up yet. (they might - I'm still hoping!)  We didn't stop just came straight from McDonalds to the Red Apple in our town.

I scooped up Paige and carried her in she wanted to get down so I let her.  She tried on a few jackets and picked out the one she liked.  She picked the blue one - not the pink one.  I laid out 3 bathing suits for her a pink two piece (tankini), the blue version of the tankini and a nautical one piece (navy and white stripes with a red ruffle AH-dorrrrable!)  Can you tell which one I wanted her to pick???  First she picked it! She picked the navy one piece I inwardly boasted look at my modest little 2 year old - then she changed her mind quick as a whip and picked the blue tankini... hm well ok.  We then made our way over to the shoes... she insisted on runners, but needed sandals we went back and forth for a few minutes until she agreed sandals were better.  Then we browsed through the different pairs until we found one we could agree upon. 

Then I saw. 

How could I not have seen this The. Whole. Time. we were in the store?!

My daughter was not wearing pants or shoes.

Baaaaaack up to the drive from city to town.  About 10 minutes from home Paige decided she needed to pee.  You don't argue when a 2 year old says I need to pee, even if they say they can hold it - they probably can't.  So we pulled over and she took FOR-ever to go.  Like 10 minutes.  By the time she finally peed I got her to shake her butt around. (air-dry, yes we are hillbilly's so nice of you to ask) I was a bit exasperated.  I put her panties and socks back on and said we'll put your shorts and shoes on before we go in the store ok? Yep, she agreed.

Except.  That we didn't.  And I didn't notice.  AT ALL. 

Parent of the year right here.

I rushed Paige, who is confused at why we are in a hurry all of a sudden, to the register to pay for our things.  I explain to the cashiers that I did not notice she was pants-less and why we are in such a state.  One laughs it off, the other very seriously hands me the bathing suit bottoms and asks, "Did you want to put these on her?" 

Uhm, no.  We have pants in the car and also she's not NUDE - I mean reallly, panties and bathing suit bottoms cover the same square footage. 

It only gets worse.

I get into the car and something dawns on me... while we were in the shoe area Paige was sitting on the floor trying on shoes - unbeknownst to me, pants-less - when a lady came and rang the bell to use the fitting room.  She rang the bell, which sounds like a door bell, and Paige shouted out DING DONG DING DONG SOMEBOOODY'S HEEREE!! I saw the lady smile a bit (I mean Paige is completely adorable and when she's also being hilarious good luck not smiling) then turned to look at Paige - her face changed she sort of made a weird look and looked away.  I thought nothing of it - chalked it up to the fact that Paige was making a mess of the shoe isle.  Not so.  She glanced at your kid and then immediately judged you for have a half naked, shoe-less child in a store... ARE YOU KIDDING ME.  I think my face was red right into Saturday.

So not naked in target but pants and shoe-less in Red Apple just didn't have the same ring... and for all my embarrasment she may as well have been naked. 

So far this is my most embarrassing moment as a parent - what's yours?



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